We had full plates and so we ate and ate until stuffing ourselves failed to satiate. Then we went for a ride to the other side and denied we had anything to hide. It was because of the night of our biggest fight when we said what we felt and felt what we might if our hearts were crushed right in everyone's sight and we're torn and forlorn about ever being born.

Loving all of God's creatures is encouraged by teachers who are sometimes just preachers with no redeeming features but an unusual fervor for some charming self-server or platitude spouting, whining and pouting, authority doubting profiteer who is incognito as a volunteer and can validate almost any fear saying just exactly what you want to hear.

I don't really care for the intimate air with which some friends share what is not really there while professing to be some great rarity trying to make you see that they're doing it for you because you want them to when they actually try to explain or deny that they especially savor some debatable flavor and can take it or leave it if only you'd believe it.

So I believe what is best as determined by the rest of the takers of the test simply playing the odds if there are no sure nods in any direction that passes close inspection and I hope I can cope with the insincere dope who tries to disguise egotistical lies as guidelines and rules for itinerant fools who are only their tools.

You just can't know the truth when there isn't any proof but, if you did, you would swear nothing about it was fair and you'd try not to care... that's the danger, right there.

My Christmas gift for you old Xanga readers is after the cut...

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what happened to me was unfortunate
yet fortunate all the same
because fortune to me is happiness
and everything is just like a game

I never need to play because it's all I really do
I work at not working so hard
and, like Dorothy said, almost everything I need
is here in my own back yard

I was thinking about my intuition today
I was trying to figure something out
and it turned out seeming like everything I do
is never what it's really about

I was thinking about opportunity, too
and how reluctantly I make it myself
and how the rarest of sights are only unseen
when attention is focused somewhere else

I never have to pray if I always have hope
I know everything will be okay
I will suffer in spite of my optimisms, though,
life has always just mostly been that way

It's about all the reasons I don't want to die
and there actually aren't that many
but I can enjoy the achievement of all my goals
without seeing  the need to have any

for the rest of my life I'm intending to be
devoted to those who are closest to me
and anyone suggesting there's anything higher
I will look in the eye and call a damned liar