I  think I’m starting to have a little trouble differentiating my memories of events from the anticipation and  come-to pass-expectations of  things that possibly never actually even happened.

@swirling_spiral

Ideally the moments could be put on pause
and rewound and lived again,
but then the moments would lose their cause
and the story would never end

It would forever be re-written
dissected by chapter and verse
and a deluge of discrepancies unhidden
and the telling would only get worse

Much better that now is quickly done,
more hurried and pat than the telling,
it gives you some time for a little fun
before deciding which parts you’re selling

Seriously

She invited me to meet her
in some neutral mid-location
to discuss our mutual future
and declare our avocation
and while I was enchanted,
I had to burst her bubble
I knew her view was slanted,
as to go to that much trouble,
and she hadn’t seen the person
behind the prattling words–
I might have been rehearsing
my audition for the birds.

Temptation of Immolation

A fevered dream begun in grudging pain
enticed me to another way of thought.
I turned my heart away from selfish gain
for that is what I knew the prophet taught.

When the dream was gone I awoke renewed
but I was young, and that was quite normal,
and my life hadn’t changed because I knew
dream enticements are never made formal.

Mind the Wind

The winds are named for where they come from
no matter where they would go,
they travel in swirls
like preoccupied girls
until they fade in a soft, gentle snow

And the skies are named for the clouds they contain
and the light they allow to shine through,
they’re always up there
and they don’t really care
they just do what the wind tells them to

Yes, the wind has a voice and it speaks to the trees
and the mountains take shape with its flow,
but we don’t know the words
so we emulate the birds
and we wonder at how the winds blow

Animalosophy
(at the zoo)

there are all kinds of animals that don’t live around here
like birds that can’t fly and peculiar looking deer
and they act just like prisoners in the penitentiary do,
they’re like, “what’re you looking at?… what’s the matter with you?”
when, probably, they are one thing that I could not be,
contented… with no illusion of ever being free

Besides That

There’s nothing I’d like more than to just run after you
but I don’t feel like inflicting all this mess I’m going through
and you shouldn’t have to worry about what I am going to do
I believe I’m too unpredictable for that

I cannot make decisions when the choices all feel wrong
and I don’t know much about living except for making it a song
but you’ve been seeing me through rose-colored lenses all along
and I think I’m much more colorful than that

But if you feel like coaxing me to climb out of my hole
you’d have my genuine gratitude as well as some control
but forget any ideas designed to save my immortal soul
I’m sure I’m much too damnable for that

this is Probably my all-time most favorite song

My whole life I’ve been wondering what to do

that means, at no point in my life had I ever truly known

  byreasoning it out, I have almosst always been shown; you see,I go with the flow,  and I can never surely know which way the flow will go

I do make great excuses S0, I’m not a total  failure.

do everything you are able to do because there will,probably come a day when you can’t do it any more.

Unless you are very lucky

Even if you consider yourself         very lucky, which you should if you are sound of body and mind and especially if somebody loves you.